If your anger issues are inferring with your relationships, job, self-esteem and/or quality of life then you have come to the right place. This article can give you some self-help suggestions or professional recommendations that will help with anger management problems, repair broken relationships, get your career back on track and boost your self-esteem.
There are many self-help techniques, therapists, classes, and programs that provide anger management help for those who have anger problems. It is important to remember that seeking help is not a sign of weakness, rather it is a sign of resilience. You are not alone, many people have problems with anger, but it is the people who do something about their anger that ultimately find peace and happiness in life.
Change Your Way of Thinking
A self-help technique that can help with anger management issues consist of changing the way you think. For instance, when you are angry you may swear, curse, use profanity or vulgarity and say hurtful things. These emotions more than likely reflect how you really feel at the time. Anger can alter your perception and cloud your judgment so it is important to reframe the way you think.
Replace your negative thoughts with more positive ones. Instead of telling that "everything is a disaster," tell yourself "things did not work out like I had hoped, but things have a way of working out in the end." In other words, turn the situation around so that you get something positive out of it. Remind yourself that getting angry and going into a rage is not going to solve the problem, rather it only make it worse.
Moreover, reframe from using words like "always" or "never: when referring to yourself or others. For instance, saying things like "you are always late" or "you never do anything right" will only intensify a hostile situation, which in turn will only make you angrier. It will not alleviate the situation and it could possibly damage your relationship. Getting angry will not make you feel better and definitely will not help the situation.
Learn Your Triggers and Avoid Them
Avoiding anger-related triggers can help with anger management issues. Learning the signs that you are about to have an anger episode can help you effectively manage your emotions. Frustrating and/or difficult situations, annoying or irritating people or unexpected events can trigger anger in some people.
These triggers that can cause your emotions spiral out of control. It is important to note that anger does not occur as a result of what is actually happening to you; rather it is your perception of the situation that elicits an angry response. Recognizing your triggers can help you control your anger and avoid situations that can cause stress.
Write down your triggers in a journal.
Address these issues in your journal:
"What happened before you became angry?"
"Who were you talking to?"
"What prompted the anger?"
"How long did you stay angry?"
"What physical symptoms did you experience during your anger episode?"
"What psychological symptoms did you experience?"
Brainstorm some ideas on how to avoid your triggers or how to reframe the situation so that you can get something positive out of it. This will calm you and help with your anger management issues.
Express Your Anger in a Healthy Way
Expressing yourself in a healthy way can help with anger management issues. If you have already decided that your anger is justified then there are ways to express how you feel without become enraged. It is understandable that you want to express your disappointment, but the key is to do it in a healthy way.
For instance, instead of ranting and raving about how your spouse forgot to pay a bill how, sit him/her down, talk to him in a calm manner about your concerns and offer some realistic solutions that will help him remember to pay your bills on time. Open, calm and honest communication can be a positive motivator for change.
Professional Mental Health Help
You can also receive anger management help through psychotherapy. Your psychotherapist helps you explore the real reasons behind your anger. He/she also helps you identify your triggers and avoid them. During anger management therapy, you learn how to control your anger so that you do not blow up in front of friends, family, co-workers, acquaintances and/or strangers. It teaches you how to manage your emotions and calm yourself when you feel an anger episode coming on. Therapy provides you with a safe, secure and non-judgmental environment to work on your anger issues.
Anger Management Classes
Anger management classes are an excellent way to get help with your anger management issues. These classes help you cope with stressful and challenging situations so that you do not become overly angry. During anger management classes, you listen to other people's stories and learn effective ways to control your anger.